It Will All Be Worth It!

I have to be careful not to throw the little guy under the bus! While I want to share many of the things that are going on in our lives, I don't want him to be embarrassed. It has been a while since I have been able to write. Life has been a huge whirlwind! If you have seen the recent pictures of the tornadoes that have ripped through the Mid-west, that is what my life has been like recently!

We finished a big night production called United, where the students lead everything. It only took some coaching on my part and some mentoring from other adult leaders. Then we went right into the Jamaica phase AND Atlanta Fest at a place called Stone Mountain. Fortunately, I have some great Youth Adult volunteers that pulled off Jamaica spectacularly while our Mission Team and I were in Jamaica! This is all on top of our Tuesday Night Bible Study and coming back on the morning of the 18th (5:30 AM) and preaching two services on the 19th!

I could say SO much about Jamaica, but I want to catch everyone up on the adoption process! First, I have to say I have the MOST amazing and supportive Church in the UNIVERSE! Not only have them been gracious and accepting of Aaron, but they have been preparing his room (Army decor - a man after my own heart, hoorah!), but they are also throwing him a "Welcome To Loganville" Party to REALLY make him feel welcome. They have also been very supportive of him on the Mission Trip and made him feel just as much a part of the team as anyone else.

I've got to set this one up a little bit: Our first day in Jamaica, we actually went to the beach in Montego Bay. (Suffering for Jesus, right?) It is just the way our schedule worked out. Usually, beach day is at the end of the week, but of course, nothing goes as "normal" for The Orchard! At the beach I discovered that, while Aaron thought he could swim, he could swim about as good as putting a pair of flippers on a rock! The flippers won't help. So, I spent time as his "water taxi" carting him around with a snorkel on each of us so that he could see all the colorful fish at the various reefs. (This after he drank about a 1/2 gallon of sea-water and regurgitated 1/4 of it back up! Yummm, chum for the fish!) After a half day of doing this and swimming "with him", he finally got the hang of "relaxing" in the water and when he got tired, turning on his back to float. (A great achievement! In a previous life many years ago, I have actually been a Life Guard, Life Guard Instructor, Water Safety Instructor, and Swim Instructor - who knew that would come in handy at my age!) Anyhoo - Aaron really got the hang of it - especially after we spent more time in the pool. (He preferred the taste of the fresh water over the taste of the saltwater.) SPOILER: this next point is important: Needless to say, Aaron took to swimming like a fish takes to, well, water! (Awesome - another "consequence" to hold over his head if he misbehaves! Can you see where this is going?)

Apparently, OSHA has been put out of business in Jamaica! Every building seemed to be comprised of stairs that had no barrier or hand rails or what have you - nor did many of the roofs. Many a curious teen had taken a stroll up to the very top of the hotel roof to get a gander of the incredible Ocean view! It was truly amazing and I was only mad at myself for not thinking of doing this until AFTER these folks got caught and there was a general announcement about staying off the roof. (At least they could plead ignorance - I had no such luxury; well, at least for this situation!)

After leaving Aaron in the capable hands of some leaders who specifically told him, "Don't go on the roof," which he apparently took as a, "Feel free to wander around on the roof" invitation, I had to leave to a different work site. Needless to say, I was none to happy when I heard of what had happened! As a natural consequence after investigating the crime, I told Aaron that he would not be allowed to go in the pool that evening. You would have thought I told him that we were about to rip his toenails off one by one and dip his feet in alcohol! He was ready to fight! He barreled out his chest, clinched his fists and declared, "I'm going to the airport!" How he was going to get there and what he would do when and if he got there was not part of his cognitive planning yet as he stormed out of the hotel toward the gate. I hollered after him, "Look buddy, if you go outside of those gates, you will also be grounded from swimming tomorrow as well. This was enough to give him pause... but only for a second or two. He really must have thought he would be able to board an International flight without any adult supervision for he went out of the gate and promptly turned to the right! The problem is that the airport... was to the left! I had to tell him, "Hey buddy, I hate to tell you the airport is back THAT way," I said pointing over my shoulder! (You would think he would have noticed this as he took his stroll on the roof and the airport is very prominent from that position.) He once again bowed up his chest and tightened his fists. I repeated my first offer but I think the reality of taking down a 220 lb., 6'3" black belt started to seem a little less than a good idea.

Feeling like he was trapped, Aaron mentally and physically jostled looking for a way to get around me in order to get to the plane that would happily take him back to the Fatherland. As we inched closer to each other, like two cowboys at a high-noon show down, I was finally able to gain the upper hand - his upper hand that is. I grabbed his right arm and wrapped around him like a snake wraps around a rat in order to keep him from running (which he has been known to do).

He tried to fight and wrestle his way out of my grip, I kid you not, for 15 minutes or so! After multiple attempts to get free, I told him, "I guess that is one of the bad sides of having a dad that is fairly strong, huh?" I also assured him, "You can keep doing this as long as you think you can last." I had to pull him a little to the side of the hotel and by some bushes so he would not be continually embarrassing himself in front of the locals. After 15 to 20 minutes of this, his entire body went limp as if he "gave up the ghost"! I asked him, "Are you finished now?" He responded with a weak, "Yes!"

Okay, tissue alert. I get teary-eyed thinking about it again. I relaxed my grip and went into more of a hug and I told him, "Buddy, I just want you to know that no matter what, I am never giving up on you and I will never let you go!" At this point, I saw a tear roll down his face. I continued as I kissed him on top of his head, "I care about you and want the best for you and that is why I am not giving up on you! Can I let go now?" "Yes," his response came back and from there he followed me back into the hotel. As we climbed the steps back toward our room, I stopped him and turned him around so he was eye level with me.

"You know," I said, "it is okay to cry! Why do you think I am getting all teary-eyed right now?" He shrugged his shoulders but correctly stated, "Because you love me?" BINGO! "Yes, because I love you and I don't want to see anything bad happen to you! How do you think I would feel if your caseworkers or my caseworker said, 'Well, Rich couldn't handle Aaron in Jamaica' and the felt like we shouldn't be together?" He replied, "You would feel pretty bad." "You're right," I said, "and I don't know about you, but I don't want to start this whole process over again, do you?" His reply came quietly but confidently, "No!" "You know I love you, right buddy?" He threw his arms around my neck, said, "Yes," and hugged me while still crying.

This parenting thing is going to make me an emotional wreck but hey, it will all be worth it!