When To Be Pastoral

I find it rather strange the times when people want you to be their Pastor:
1. When talking about where you go to church (even if you only go 3 times a year),
2. If you make them feel good with a warm-fuzzy message and good worship music,
3. When people want a "traditional" wedding and need a Pastor (even if the Pastor is not really your Pastor).
4. When people need to pull the "God" card in a conversation,
5. When people need someone else straightened up, (ie., kids, spouse, etc.),
6. When people need a "miracle" or emergency prayer,
7. When someone needs you to do their funeral.

Here is when people do not want you to be their Pastor:
1. When they need to be held accountable (maybe smoking pot or drinking with your kid or the way your kid (or for that matter, mom and dad) isn't exactly dressing appropriate). Seriously, do we need so much cleavage at the Church of all places? Heaven forbid a Pastor should be HONEST! And let's not get caught up in the cultural lie, "The Bible says we shouldn't judge anyone." REALLY? The Bible clearly talks about not judging UNBELIEVERS but we as believers are to hold each other accountable and bear each others burdens. And don't throw out the "holier than thou" cliche either. If it upsets you that I am going through a process of sanctification, asking you AS A BELIEVER to do the same (but you refuse), then yes, maybe I am holier than thou. Deal with it. Trust me, I am not casting stones, but I am making a whip. Seems like I have some pretty good company in that arena. Notice the audience - sinner who knew she needed help (no stone throwing needed) as opposed to people who claimed to know God intimately but where hypocrites FOR NOT BEING HELD ACCOUNTABLE (enter the mad man with a whip).
2. When the Church needs funding. Do people think God just magically drops money out of the sky to pay the utilities, maintenance, logistics, staff salaries? Lest you think I am living in opulence, I live in a $60,000.00 town home, drive a 2000 Ford Explorer that is literally falling apart, paying for my own continuing education, have no retirement benefits, pay some of my medical AND raising a child. For heaven's sake people, no wonder Pastors have to beg for funding - we are literally close to being beggars ourselves! At my age, most people make almost 3 times what I make. Seriously, what do you think we do with the money? Frankly, the people who typically give the least are the ones who complain the most. See a correlation?
3. When the Pastor is not perfect, but is expected to be.

I am certain there are other times people don't want a Pastor to be their Pastor, but one and two listed above are pretty much the "biggies".